Last night, we watched "An Education," a newer film. Perhaps you haven't even heard of it. It hasn't been much publicized. The story, in short, is about a sixteen year old girl that gets involved with a much older guy. She falls in love with him (or maybe the party life of jazz concerts, trips to Paris, and pretty art.) The man is a con artist, and even when she finds out, he convinces her to stay with him--and he uses his con skills to reel in her parents. Maybe an hour into the movie, we find him telling his friend "she is the one" and asking her to marry him. Everyone is quite happy, and her parents even tell her to forsake her dreams of Oxford and marry him. She drops out of school, missing her last exams, and sets her life on course to marry this man. Sadly, she soon finds out he is currently married. It all blows up in her face, and she finds out she is not the first woman to have this promise. There is a good ending, which I appreciate, where she does find a way to take her exams and go to Oxford... but the movie left me sad.
It was so heavy. Why was it? Because an older man preyed on a naive younger girl? No. He was wrong, but he did have real feelings for her. Was it heavy because she gave away her future without knowing what she was doing, mirroring many youth today? No. It was heavy because there was no Jesus. All the parties, flowers, and concerts in the world-- all the charming men and fun friends-- they leave the world still largely bleak and heavy. We need Jesus!
The movie attempts to give another option for happiness. The girl visits her old English teacher in desperation at the end, finding her home bright, cheery and cozy-- with a few pieces of good art and a piano. The girl concludes that this is really what everyone needs: a nice, small space of their own.
I don't buy it.
It's Jesus.
Saturday, February 26, 2011
Saturday, February 19, 2011
Worship
In Colossians 3:17, we are told, "And whatever you do, whether in word or deed, do it all in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through him."
The question: what does it mean to do everything in the name of Jesus. Josh picked my up from a babysitting job tonight, and as we drove back, I wondered:
Does "worship" always have to be a conscious, intellectual process? Or can I still be worshiping God when I am caught up in the bliss of making music? If my heart were first captive to Jesus, if my identity were to lie in him, if my life ambitions were grounded in him... and I got caught up in bliss... without an intentional, mental focus on Jesus... could it still be worship?
It would seem that it must be possible... because to both be thinking about Jesus and doing math equations in your head at the same time is impossible. There is no way to add two plus two but at the same moment be thinking about Jesus. It is possible to have thoughts of him mixed in between questions... but is that what worship is supposed to look like? Not to be irreverent, but let's think about this: Two plus two is four. Wow, it's awesome that God made the world so logical. Four plus four is eight. Man, I am so thankful that God is orderly.... That just seems impractical and ridiculous.
So. What is it? Where is the thing that turns a normal act into worship? Is it the motives? If I am learning math to learn how to better serve Jesus, it stands to reason that it would be worship. But it still leaves the question, is simply having Jesus-focused overarching motives doing everything in the name of Jesus? It is clearly not possible to have our sights 100% on Jesus in the middle of everything.
Perhaps you think I am over thinking.
Think again.
Example: Josh and I took my friend Cathy's two little boys bowling. I realized, an hour into bowling, that I had not once thought about Jesus in that hour. I had been focused on getting the boys to enjoy themselves and enjoy our company. While that is important... not thinking about Jesus once in a whole hour is pretty sad, no matter what my motives are. Ultimately, I should not want to just "make them happy," but I should want to draw them closer to Jesus.
Well, bedtime. The wheels keep turning. Maybe the answers will all come to me in a dream :P
The question: what does it mean to do everything in the name of Jesus. Josh picked my up from a babysitting job tonight, and as we drove back, I wondered:
Does "worship" always have to be a conscious, intellectual process? Or can I still be worshiping God when I am caught up in the bliss of making music? If my heart were first captive to Jesus, if my identity were to lie in him, if my life ambitions were grounded in him... and I got caught up in bliss... without an intentional, mental focus on Jesus... could it still be worship?
It would seem that it must be possible... because to both be thinking about Jesus and doing math equations in your head at the same time is impossible. There is no way to add two plus two but at the same moment be thinking about Jesus. It is possible to have thoughts of him mixed in between questions... but is that what worship is supposed to look like? Not to be irreverent, but let's think about this: Two plus two is four. Wow, it's awesome that God made the world so logical. Four plus four is eight. Man, I am so thankful that God is orderly.... That just seems impractical and ridiculous.
So. What is it? Where is the thing that turns a normal act into worship? Is it the motives? If I am learning math to learn how to better serve Jesus, it stands to reason that it would be worship. But it still leaves the question, is simply having Jesus-focused overarching motives doing everything in the name of Jesus? It is clearly not possible to have our sights 100% on Jesus in the middle of everything.
Perhaps you think I am over thinking.
Think again.
Example: Josh and I took my friend Cathy's two little boys bowling. I realized, an hour into bowling, that I had not once thought about Jesus in that hour. I had been focused on getting the boys to enjoy themselves and enjoy our company. While that is important... not thinking about Jesus once in a whole hour is pretty sad, no matter what my motives are. Ultimately, I should not want to just "make them happy," but I should want to draw them closer to Jesus.
Well, bedtime. The wheels keep turning. Maybe the answers will all come to me in a dream :P
Monday, February 14, 2011
Summer Job!
Well friends, I am waiting! I have an interview coming up on Friday for a job as a youth ministry intern in Florida, and I am waiting for a call from Winshape camps about a job. Soon the chips will fall in place! I am really excited to see where God takes me this summer. The cool thing is, if I am able to get either of these jobs, they will allow for at least a little time at home on either end of the summer. Not only that, but they will also be a great use of my gifts! We'll see.
As you can probably guess, after a lot of prayer, God did not put Mexico on my heart as "where I belong" for the summer. PLEASE continue to pray for those precious kids and all of my dear friends in Acapulco. Pray that the Lord uses other people to reach the kids at Casa Hogar and Sobre el Puente. Pray especially that the Lord gives wisdom to the leaders at Sobre el Puente as they deal with some hard things.
Valentine's Day is today. Good stuff! Unfortunately, both Josh and I are on duty--so it looks to be a quiet, separated night. He was a sweetheart and got me daisies (my favorite), but it looks like the real celebration of the day will be on Friday evening. That should be fun.
God is ever-faithful.
As you can probably guess, after a lot of prayer, God did not put Mexico on my heart as "where I belong" for the summer. PLEASE continue to pray for those precious kids and all of my dear friends in Acapulco. Pray that the Lord uses other people to reach the kids at Casa Hogar and Sobre el Puente. Pray especially that the Lord gives wisdom to the leaders at Sobre el Puente as they deal with some hard things.
Valentine's Day is today. Good stuff! Unfortunately, both Josh and I are on duty--so it looks to be a quiet, separated night. He was a sweetheart and got me daisies (my favorite), but it looks like the real celebration of the day will be on Friday evening. That should be fun.
God is ever-faithful.
Wednesday, February 9, 2011
Self-Sufficient... Not Even Close
My suspicion, of late, is that God is working on tearing down any notion of self-sufficiency that I possess. I am a generally responsible student, and I like to be "ahead." This semester, however, every time I catch up and start working ahead, the Lord brings some hard event to stop me in my tracks. The range of progress-stoppers have included important conversations, sprained ankles that distract, sickness, etc.
I get it, though. As soon as I start getting ahead in school, I stop realizing my need for Jesus as much. If I don't feel stressed, I am not as apt to realize that it's only Jesus that sustains me.
So, the question is: how do I learn to not only intellectually know that I am not self-sufficient, but to emotionally feel my inadequacy? Perhaps this series of... little encouragements from the Lord... perhaps, that will instill this in me.
Jesus, I know I need you. I know I need Your Spirit to help me through every aspect of my life if I'm serious about living for You. I know, Father, that You sustain my every breath. Help me feel it.
I get it, though. As soon as I start getting ahead in school, I stop realizing my need for Jesus as much. If I don't feel stressed, I am not as apt to realize that it's only Jesus that sustains me.
So, the question is: how do I learn to not only intellectually know that I am not self-sufficient, but to emotionally feel my inadequacy? Perhaps this series of... little encouragements from the Lord... perhaps, that will instill this in me.
Jesus, I know I need you. I know I need Your Spirit to help me through every aspect of my life if I'm serious about living for You. I know, Father, that You sustain my every breath. Help me feel it.
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